Mirror_mirror____by_CatabuWe all tell ourselves in some way, probably every day, that we are lacking, or sometimes even just bad: Our bellies are squishy and fat, our legs look like tree trunks, we have no self-control over food. Then there is the ensuing depression, anxiety and anger that goes along with it.

You know the old saying you can’t love someone else until you love yourself? True, but I think if you’re waiting to love yourself before you find your partner, you’ll be waiting a long time — maybe forever — because learning self-compassion is just so freaking hard.

Here’s how we can start. It may be radical, but it’s worth a try.

1. Take that mirror off your closet door.
You’re thinking, But I need it! How will I know how I look before I walk out the door? Completely valid — walking out in mismatched plaid and wild hair is not going to help anyone.

2. Get the scale out too.
It’s cliché to say “it’s just a number,” but it is. There are plenty of ways to know if you’re at a weight you feel comfortable with — your clothes will tell you, your stamina, your friends (real ones).

3. Stop grabbing your flab.
Remember that ad asking, “Can you pinch an inch?” Whoever made up that commercial should be berated in public. Grabbing your belly, thighs and arms is a guaranteed way to ruin your day.

4. Quit talking about it.
We all do it. “OMG — I’ve gained so much weight!” “Why did I eat like a pig?” It may be a bond between girls, but we’re just reinforcing the self-loathing among ourselves. Quit it.

5. Quit wearing sweatpants and size XXL shirts to cover yourself up.
You’re only reminding yourself of how much you hate your body, and oversize clothing just makes you look bigger than you actually are. You don’t have to wear something skin tight — just nicely-fitted.

6. DO look at yourself in the mirror while you’re working out.
You may be mad at yourself on the way in, but why you are workin’ it, sweatin’it, you’ll see a strong body; a body that you can be proud of because it’s healthy and so are you.

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